How to get to know a person better

Incredible facts

Can you imagine a world where there is no deception? It is unlikely that someone has enough imagination to realize how much we will lose or how much we will gain if we stop lying to each other. Man lies every day, so the skills to bring the interlocutor to clean water useful to everyone.

Moreover, each of us was once mistaken in people. At such moments, we think about how it was possible not to immediately notice that a person is unreliable and cannot be relied on. And it also happens that we simply cannot find mutual language with someone, because they did not bother to observe the person in order to create his portrait.

But how do you really recognize a person? Colleague, potential partner, friend? There are a lot of articles on the Internet, like "ask these questions to get to know a person for real." But how do you imagine it? Do you put the person in front of you and start interrogating? Not very many people will agree to this.

The other extreme is to believe that a person can only be recognized over a long period of time. However, coach John Alex Clark is sure that the key in this issue is not time, but observation and the ability to connect the information received in one chain.

There are several very simple and at the same time powerful techniques that will help you identify patterns in a person's behavior and find out his character. Let's talk about them.

How to recognize a person

1. Notice the details

Every day a person commits great amount routine activities: buying food, traveling in transport, talking on the phone, etc. A person's actions can shed light on his personality, as well as help predict how he will behave in a given situation.

Example A. If a person chooses the same dish every day in a cafe, then he probably avoids change, and he does not like the state of uncertainty. Such people can be loyal and devoted spouses. But on the other hand, it will be extremely difficult to convince him to make risky investments or move to another country.

Example B. People who enjoy gambling and other risky activities are more likely to take risks in other areas of their lives. For example, such a person may quit his job without finding another and not thinking about financial security during the period of unemployment.

Example B. A person who always looks both ways when crossing a road is likely to be prudent and careful. He will thoroughly think over every little thing before making any decision, and will only take a well-calculated risk.

That is, if you analyze a person's actions in one area, you will be able to understand how he will behave in other areas.

2. Pay attention to how the person communicates

How does your interlocutor behave in communication? Is he trying to build relationships with each person, or does he single out those who are close to him in spirit, and keep the rest at his outstretched hand? Does he talk without a clear plan, on a whim, focusing on impressions, or does he constantly analyze, tries to be objective and does not trust intuition?

Is a person more of a thinker based on concepts, images, schemes and ideas, or is he more of a practitioner living in a world of measurable values, tasks and facts? If you observe everyday words and behavior, then you will be able to trace the general line.

3. Talk to the person about relationships with mutual acquaintances, about contacts at work

Many people think that gossiping is an empty exercise devoid of any meaning. However, the main thing in this question is what qualities the interlocutor gives to other people, how he explains their behavior. Often, when we talk about other people, we unconsciously notice what is present in ourselves.

These conversations will help us understand what we value in the people around us, whom we want to be like, and what we want to change in ourselves. The more often we say of others that they are emotionally stable, happy, kindhearted, or polite, the more likely we are ourselves to have these characteristics.

If a person says about another that he is pretending to dig a hole for someone, then this may mean that such a person is calculating and builds only relationships based on momentary profit.

4. Feel the existing boundaries

When a person wants to build a relationship, he sees the good and ignores the bad. However, sooner or later, illusions will dissipate anyway, and the person will appear before you in all its glory. A person who knows how to communicate correctly, first of all, will look in the interlocutor not for the good, but for his boundaries.

If the opponent is nice, where does the courtesy end? He wants to help, but where will this desire stop? If he's sincere, when will he start to darken? Is he tolerant of subordinates' mistakes up to what point? Honest with your clients? What if it comes about a sum with many zeros?

Adequate, sober, understanding, reasonable? Where is his limit, crossing which he turns into a madman?

5. Pay attention to the person's behavior in a critical situation

When force majeure happens, a person shows himself in all his glory, he simply cannot play or dissemble. He does not have time to put on the mask, and therefore begins to behave as his instincts want.

How to really recognize a person

6. Pay attention to his attitude towards service personnel

People with whom life was unfair, in their opinion, have a habit of breaking down on the service personnel. Sellers, waiters, cleaners - everyone gets it. If your interlocutor calls the waiter with a snap of his fingers or a whistle, then this is the first sign that the person, at least, is poorly brought up with all the consequences.

7. Observe intonation and body language

There is a lot of information on the internet about body language. Liars are recognized by some signs: they pause in the conversation, change the topic of the conversation, begin to make excuses, even if there is no reproach, when answering a question they avert their eyes, often touch their face.

The soul of a person draws his face - by the peculiar features of the face, you can determine the main features of the character. Sometimes this skill is very useful when you need to make the first impression of an unfamiliar person. Faces change over the years, but specific traits become even more expressive with age. The science of face reading comes from China. Chinese physiognomists believe that by the face you can find out the mood, character, habits and even predict the fate of a person.

Determine the character of a person by the shape of the face

• The rectangular shape distinguishes people who are sensitive, balanced, intellectually developed. Such personalities have pronounced organizational skills, know how to lead and strive for the set goal. At the same time, they have delicacy and tact in communication, depending on the situation.
• The triangular shape of the face betrays people with a complex and contradictory nature. They are prone to loneliness and choosing their own path, immersed in themselves, have sensitivity and creativity. They are more attracted to self-development and the spiritual than the material sphere.
• People with a round face are distinguished by their gentleness and peacefulness, openness to communication, and often become the soul of any company. Above all, such individuals value consistency in relationships, a comfortable life, giving preference to material benefits and values.
• The trapezoidal shape of the face speaks of a cheerful disposition, cheerfulness and optimism. Such natures are distinguished by calmness, poise and are always ready to share their joy with others. However, they rarely become leaders and leaders, having too soft and flexible disposition.

Determine the character of a person by the eyes

The eyes of a person remain unchanged, and it is they who can most of all tell about their owner. Even if a person has learned to control the expression of his eyes, their shape will tell a lot.

• Big eyes are a sign of sensitivity and susceptibility, as well as a domineering nature. Little ones - talk about stubbornness, complacency and a tendency to outbursts of jealousy.
• The round shape of the eyes indicates the rigidity and irascibility of character.
• Narrow eyes betray a secretive nature, deep-seated - about inconstancy and treachery.
• If the edges of the eyes of the interlocutor are beveled up, you have a decisive and courageous person in front of you.
• The eyes are slanted down - such a person is distinguished by good nature, optimism and attentiveness.
• If the outer corners of the eyes are bent upwards, this indicates recklessness and greed.
• The outer corners are directed downward - means obedience, humility and a led nature.
• If the eyes have overhanging upper eyelids, then the person has a great sexual temperament, but at the same time a cold heart and a calculating mind.
• The upper eyelids fall from the middle to the outer corners of the eyes - a tendency to pessimism.
• Swollen eyelids - fatigue and disappointment in life.

Determine the character of a person by the nose

Sometimes the nose is the most visible part of the face, thus forming the overall expression, so it is worth paying attention to its shape.

• Conservative people have a long nose, and intellectually developed, but capricious personalities have a very long nose.
• A short nose indicates friendliness, openness and optimism.
• A thin nose indicates a weakness of nature and an inability to concentrate.
• If the nose is crooked or kinked, it can be argued that in front of you is a person who is stubborn, decisive and even aggressive.
• A small female nose indicates pettiness, jealousy.
• If the tip of the nose is round, such a person is successful in life.
• Upturned tip - inability to keep secrets, fussiness.

Determine the character of a person by the mouth and lips

The lips of women may undergo some changes, but the shape and shape of the mouth remains constant.

• If the lower lip is larger than the upper lip, this indicates a stubborn and self-centered personality.
  Protruding above the bottom upper lip characterizes a person who is vain, indecisive, prone to doubts.
• The slightly raised corners of the lips distinguish a romantic nature, if one corner is noticeably higher than the other, beware of deception.
• Thin lips betray a cruel and domineering person, and full and soft lips - sensitive, possessing logical thinking.
• A protruding and prominent mouth on the face indicates the flexibility of the mind, an active, decisive and active personality.
• A small mouth indicates a weakness of character, if the lips are tightly compressed, such a person is shy and tends to postpone all matters and decisions for later.
• Twitching lips indicate nervousness and constant tension.
• Mouth slanted to one side - a tendency to ridicule and sarcasm.

The skills of determining character traits by the face will be useful when establishing contacts in business sphere and will also help you not to make mistakes in everyday communication with strangers.