Who can be the child's godfather? Who can be godparents? Who definitely cannot be a recipient

Ekaterina Morozova

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Have you been chosen as godmother? This is a great honor and a great responsibility. The responsibilities of the godmother are not limited only to the sacrament of baptism and congratulating the godson on the holidays - they will continue throughout life. What are these responsibilities? What do you need to know about the sacrament of baptism? What to buy? How to prepare?

Baptism - the essence and meaning of the rite of baptism

The rite of baptism is a Sacrament in which the believer dies to a sinful carnal life in order to be reborn by the Holy Spirit into spiritual life. Baptism is cleansing a person from original sin , which is communicated to him through his birth. Just as a person is born only once, and the Sacrament is performed only once in a person’s life.

How godparents prepare for the baptism ceremony

You should prepare for the Sacrament of Baptism in advance.

• Two or three days before the ceremony, future godparents should repent of your earthly sins and take communion.
• Directly on the day of baptism It is forbidden to have sex and eat food .
• At the baptism of a girl godmother will have to read the prayer “Creed” , at the baptism of a boy he reads it godfather .

Responsibilities of a godmother. What should a godmother do?

A child cannot choose his godmother himself; his parents make this choice for him. The exception is the older age of the child. The choice is usually determined the closeness of the future godmother to the family , a warm attitude towards the child, the principles of morality that the godmother adheres to.

What are the responsibilities godmother?

• Godmother vouches for the newly baptized child before the Lord.
• Responsible for spiritual education baby.
• Takes part in life and education the baby on a par with biological parents.
• Takes care of the child in a situation where something happens to the biological parents ( godmother can become a guardian in the event of the death of parents).

Godmother is spiritual guide for her godson and example Christian image life.

The godmother must:

• Pray for the godson and to be a loving and caring godmother.
• Attend church with a child , if his parents do not have such an opportunity due to illness or absence.
• Remember your responsibilities in days religious holidays, regular holidays and weekdays.
• Take problems in your godson's life seriously and support him during difficult stages of life .
• Be interested and promote spiritual growth baby .
• Serve example of godly living for the godson.

Features of the baptism ritual

How is the sacrament of child baptism performed?

Requirements for a godmother at a christening

The most important requirement for godparents is be baptized Orthodox who live according to Christian laws. After the ceremony, godparents must promote the spiritual growth of the child and pray for him. If the future godmother has not yet been baptized, then she must be baptized first , and only then – the baby. Biological parents may be completely unbaptized or profess a different faith.

• Godmother must be aware of your responsibility for raising a child. Therefore, it is welcomed when relatives are chosen as godparents - family ties break less often than friendly ones.
• The godfather can attend the girl’s baptism in absentia, godmother - only in person . Her duties include receiving the girl from the font.

Godparents We must not forget about the day of baptism . On the day of the Godson's Guardian Angel, you should go to church every year, light a candle and thank God for everything.

What should a godmother wear? Appearance of the godmother at the christening.

The modern church is more loyal to many things, but taking into account its traditions is certainly recommended. Basic requirements for a godmother at baptism:

• Presence of godparents pectoral crosses (consecrated in the church) necessarily.
• It is unacceptable to come to baptism in trousers. Should wear a dress , which will hide the shoulders and legs below the knee.
• On the godmother's head must have a scarf .
• High heels are unnecessary. The baby will have to be held in your arms for a long time.
• Flashy makeup and provocative clothing are prohibited.

What do godparents buy for baptism?

• White christening shirt (dress). It can be simple or with embroidery - it all depends on the choice of the godparents. The shirt (and everything else) can be purchased directly from the church. At baptism, the baby’s old clothes are removed as a sign that he appears clean before the Lord, and the baptismal shirt is put on after the ceremony. Traditionally, this shirt should be worn for eight days, after which it is removed and stored for life. Of course, you cannot baptize another baby in it.
• Pectoral cross with an image of the crucifixion. They buy it directly from the church, already consecrated. It doesn’t matter - gold, silver or simple, on a string. After baptism, many people remove the crosses from their children so that they do not accidentally harm themselves. According to church canons, the cross should not be removed. Therefore, it is better to choose a light cross and a rope (ribbon) so that the baby is comfortable.
• , in which the baby is wrapped after the Sacrament of baptism. It is not washed after the ceremony and is stored as carefully as a shirt.
• Cap(kerchief).
• The best gift from godparents would be cross, icon or silver spoon.

Also for the baptism ceremony you will need:

• baby blanket. For a comfortable baby in the baptismal room and warming the baby after the baptismal bath.
• Small bag, where you can put a lock of the baby’s hair, cut by a priest. You can keep it with your shirt and towel.

It is advisable to make sure in advance that the items are suitable for the baby.

After the baptism ceremony

So, the baby was baptized. You have become a godmother. Of course, according to tradition, this day is a holiday. It can be celebrated in a warm family circle or crowded. But it is worth remembering that christening is, first of all, a celebration of the spiritual birth of a baby. You should prepare for it in advance and thoroughly, thinking through every detail. After all spiritual birthday, which you will celebrate now every year, much more important than the day physical birth.

Unless anyone is born of water and the Spirit,

cannot enter the Kingdom of God(John 3:5)

For the birth of a child in Orthodox family his baptism follows. Unfortunately, not all Orthodox Christians are churchgoers, so many questions arise: what is the time frame for a child’s baptism, how does the procedure itself work, who are the godparents, who can be spiritual teachers for boys and girls?

The Orthodox Church does not set the age of baptism for children. In each family, this issue is resolved independently, based on the characteristics of the way of life, the health of the child, and so on.

For centuries, a tradition has been established to baptize infants no earlier than 40 days from their birth. There is an explanation for this. His parents brought Jesus Christ to the Temple for dedication to God on the fortieth day, according to the custom of the ancient Jews.

During the same period, a woman after childbirth goes through a period of cleansing. After reading a special prayer, she can visit the temple and fully participate in the life of the Church and its Sacraments, including being present at the baptism of her child.

If the baby is weak and sick, you can wait until he grows up and gets stronger. The church prays for “mother and child,” so God’s help will not leave both of them, but the child’s full participation in church life will be possible only after baptism.

If the life of a newborn is in danger of death, then it is better to baptize him as early as possible in order to be able to pray for health or remember him during the Liturgy. Regular communion, which is possible only for a Christian, will strengthen the child’s physical and spiritual strength.

When the family decides to baptize their child, you still shouldn’t put off the most important event in his life for too long. There is another argument in favor of this decision: a baby at the age of 1-2 months is not yet attached to his mother and family, he is not frightened by strangers and extraneous sounds. Throughout the Sacrament, the godparents will hold the baby in their arms; an older child may resist this.

Features of christenings for boys and girls

The sacrament of Baptism can be performed on a person who consciously believes in Christian truths. An adult himself testifies to his readiness to unite with Christ and receive the gifts of the Holy Spirit. It is impossible to expect conscious faith from infants. During the Sacrament of Baptism, they must take a vow of fidelity to God and renounce the forces of evil and sin.

Is it possible to baptize them? “Yes, it’s possible,” answers the Orthodox Church. Receivers from the font or godparents are given to the baby at baptism in order to be responsible for him before the Lord not only during the sacrament itself, but also in subsequent earthly and eternal life. Infants are baptized according to their faith and the faith of the parents.

Godparents have a special role in the spiritual education of a child. They make a promise to God to lead the godson through life in a Christian way, to raise him in the spirit of the Orthodox faith. The life of the recipients themselves should be a worthy example of piety and love for God and for others. According to established tradition, a godfather and a godmother are chosen for the child, by analogy with the parents.

However, according to church canons one thing is enough:

• men - for a boy;
• women - for girls.

There may even be gender mismatch. However, each such case is considered individually, and the decision is made by the priest. The main thing is that future godparents are full members of the Orthodox Church, know the basics of the Orthodox faith and are ready to raise the child spiritually.

Who cannot be among the godparents according to church rules?

For newborn boys and girls, before choosing adopters, it is necessary to know who can and cannot become them.

The priest will refuse to administer the Sacrament of Baptism if the following are chosen as recipients:

Can godparents be husband and wife or become one in the future? There are no canons prohibiting this in Orthodoxy. In 2017 Bishops' Council updated the permission for marriages of successors with the blessing of the diocesan bishop. Such permission existed before, but a tradition has developed to prohibit such marriages.

Who can be a godparent for a boy or girl?

The main criterion when choosing recipients is their belonging to Orthodoxy, as well as their church membership - the desire to live in accordance with Christian truths, fight sin, and correct themselves.

The mission of the recipients is to testify before God for their ward about faith, renunciation of Satan, a promise to build their lives according to the commandments of God, and to help their godson or goddaughter fulfill all these promises in the future life.

Spiritual work continues throughout the life of godparents and their godchildren. Prayer for godchildren must be supported by real deeds: take the child to communion, read spiritual literature with him, learn a prayer, explain the foundations of the Orthodox faith.

The Church allows one of the godparents to be of a different Christian faith - Catholic or Protestant, if there is no possibility of finding an Orthodox Christian in the family environment.

A clergyman can become a godson, but as a rule, they have many responsibilities and will have little free time for full communication with the godson.

Age of majority is an optional but desirable condition. The responsibility that godparents take on in the face of God involves understanding the importance of the role of the godparent and understanding what spiritual mentoring is.

Can godparents be relatives of the child?

The child's relatives, including the closest ones, can be chosen to play the role of recipient. Except for the parents.

Before you choose one of your relatives as your child's adoptive parent, you need to think about this: a few years will pass, and the child will grow up. Teenagers are not ready to discuss their problems with their closest relatives; this is the psychology of this age.

They are looking for an authoritative adult outside the family. A godfather could become such a person, help and guide the teenager in the right direction. Christian path development. Of course, provided that in all previous years he took an active part in raising his godson, and they developed a trusting relationship.

From this point of view, choosing close relatives for the role of adoptive parents is not always the best solution.

It is right to choose church-going Orthodox Christians who will raise the child in faith and love for God, respect for people.

You need to answer the following questions:

• Who can you entrust the body and soul of a child to?
• Who will help raise him in faith?
• Who can you become spiritually related to?

Godparents are mentors in the Orthodox faith, and not rare guests with gifts at birthdays. True Christian love is the most valuable gift to godchildren from their godparents, and vital role– to be an example in the organization of Christian life.

How to choose godparents for a child if the parents are non-believers?

Unbelieving parents can baptize their children. Strictly speaking, the presence of parents is not necessary. In some churches, the priest does not allow parents to attend the Sacrament at all.

In Soviet times, grandmothers brought their children to be baptized without the participation of atheist parents.

They preserved and remembered the Orthodox faith and hoped for the mercy of God. Having grown up, these children came to God consciously.

Godparents, who can be spiritual educators for boys and girls, take full responsibility for raising a child in the truths of the Gospel.

Their role increases many times over: only they can graft a branch onto the Tree of Life, cultivate the seeds of the Orthodox faith in the soul of the godson.

You can baptize a child even if the parents are of a different faith.

In such situations, first of all, you need to think about the benefits for the child: the parents must have consent to baptism in order to avoid conflicts.

Is it possible to baptize a child without godparents?

Sometimes there are such life situations, when a child needs to be baptized urgently, for example, if he is in danger of death. The priest can perform the Sacrament of baptism without recipients, so that he can help the child in the struggle for life with the help of the Holy Gifts and common prayer the entire Orthodox Church.

In the future, when the baby gets better, you can find people who will become godparents for the child and help the parents spiritually raise the boy or girl. Churched parents can do this on their own.

In emergency situations, lay people can baptize a baby by saying the Baptismal Prayer. At the first opportunity, the priest will complete what he started, since the process of Baptism consists of several stages and ends with the Sacrament of Confirmation.

Responsibilities of godparents

Godparents have serious responsibilities towards their godchildren in raising them in the traditions of the Orthodox Church:

Godparents renounce sin for the child and undertake obligations for the spiritual education of the godson before God. The Church teaches that at the last judgment He will ask for the upbringing of godchildren in the same way as for the upbringing of his own children.

Now it becomes clear why choosing godparents is a responsible and difficult decision. The connection with them can become stronger than with blood relatives, since it is sanctified by the Lord and is based on Christian love.

How can godparents prepare for the Great Sacrament?

For a churchgoer there is nothing special in preparation. Prayer, fasting, confession, communion, reading the Gospel - the ordinary life of a Christian. Each parish may have its own traditions, so it is worth checking with the church where the baptism will take place whether there are any special requirements for recipients.

In many parishes, so-called public meetings are held for those future godparents who are still little familiar with the life of the Church. The priest explains in detail the main provisions of the Orthodox faith, talks about the Sacrament of Baptism, as well as those parish traditions that relate to baptism.

Godparents, who can be godparents for boys and girls from the font, so as not to approach holy duties formally, must prepare themselves to participate in the upcoming Sacrament:

• read at least one Gospel;
• carefully study the Creed - it is read out loud during baptism;
• if possible, learn “Our Father” - one of the main Christian prayers;
• confess and receive communion.

Even if the priest does not require it, it is advisable to take such steps. The duties of godparents require involvement in the Church. Therefore, from this moment the deliverance of the recipients themselves from sinful slavery can begin, the beginning of their new life in Christ and with Christ has been laid. Only then is it possible to fully fulfill the duties of a spiritual mentor.

IN Orthodox church the woman must wear a skirt that covers her knees and cover her head. A man must wear trousers and no headdress.

What should godparents have during a christening?

To perform the Sacrament of Baptism, the priest only needs pectoral cross and the shirt, everything else is a tribute to tradition.

Most often, godparents prepare:

These items are kept throughout life as a shrine. There is no need to wash the kryzhma: if the child gets sick, you can cover the baby with it so that it will help him recover faster.

There are no strict rules about who prepares what for baptism. Different localities and parishes have their own traditions, and they may differ from each other. You need to agree in advance who is responsible for what.

The child’s parents can prepare everything they need themselves. Things sewn or knitted will retain the warmth of the hands and love of the one who created them.

What else to consider before Baptism:

1. An important question concerns the cost of baptism. The Sacrament of Baptism, like all other Sacraments and rites of the Church, is performed free of charge. As a sign of gratitude, you can donate a certain amount to the temple. You can find out its size at the arrival or determine it yourself.
2. Usually the child is given a certificate of Baptism, the names of the child and his adoptive parents are written on it, so their documents may be needed.
3. You need to find out whether it is possible to photograph the Baptism process; not all priests allow this.
4. The sacrament lasts long enough, the baby will need ordinary care products.

Baptism procedure

Baptism takes place in the temple itself or in a special baptismal room, which can be a separate building. In fact, these are two separate Sacraments, following each other: Baptism and Confirmation.

The entire procedure lasts about 40 minutes. All this time the baby is in the arms of the recipients, they hand him over to the priest when the ritual requires it.

Godparents, who can be spiritual parents for boys or girls, can familiarize themselves with the Baptism scheme, to imagine how things will happen:

It is advisable to give the child communion for the first time the next day.

The sacrament of Baptism is the first sacrament that a Christian receives. Without it, the beginning of a new life with Christ and in Christ is impossible, and, therefore, salvation is impossible. A newborn child has not yet done anything wrong, but he inherits the sinful nature of his first parents. He is already on his way to death.

During Baptism, in an incomprehensible way, a person is cleansed from sin, dies to it and is born again in purity, receives hope of salvation and eternal life. This is possible only in connection with the Lord. The Body of Christ is called the Church.

According to its wise arrangement, the Sacrament of Confirmation follows immediately after Baptism. A person receives the mysterious gifts of the Holy Spirit, which will act invisibly in him and strengthen him in his desire to live according to Christ.

Godparents, who can guide boys and girls on the path to eternal life, take responsibility for whether they go forward or stay put. The sacrament of Baptism so far only places the child at the beginning of this road.

Is the magical, magical effect of Baptism possible without faith? The answer to this question is given by the Gospel: “According to your faith, be it done to you” (Matthew 9:29). Where is it true faith, there is no need for superstition.

What to give to a godson or goddaughter?

A christening gift should have a spiritual meaning, be useful for the further upbringing of the child in Orthodox traditions and remind of the day of spiritual birth.

These could be:

Many interesting gifts are sold in church shops. It's not about the cost, but about the spiritual value of the item.

Can a pregnant woman be a godmother?

There are no obstacles for a woman to become a godmother.

It is necessary to evaluate whether she has enough love, kindness and opportunities for two children: her unborn one and the adopted one. From godparents, not only spiritual and prayer help, but also effective, requiring effort and time.

Is it possible to refuse godparents?

A child cannot refuse such godparents. Godparents may change for the worse and stop fulfilling their responsibilities towards their godson or goddaughter. In such cases, you need to teach the child to pray for their correction. This will become for him a lesson in Christian love and mercy.

If parents still need help in the spiritual upbringing of their child, they can find a pious, church-going person and ask him to take on the responsibilities of a godparent, but he still will not be considered a godparent. For such an agreement it is necessary to obtain the blessing of a priest or confessor, if you have one.

Is it possible to baptize a child for normal upbringing in the faith?

Such a concept as crossing into Orthodox Church No. A person is not born twice, either physically or spiritually, and Baptism is a spiritual birth in Christ.

In order for a child to be raised in the Orthodox faith, the adults around him must live according to the canons of this faith and be an example in a pious Christian life.

The responsibility that falls on godparents is great. Their mission goes beyond the time-bound nature of earthly life. Godparents are those who can be guides to the Kingdom of God for boys and girls.

Article format: Vladimir the Great

Video about children's baptism

What you need to know before baptizing a child:

", published by the publishing house Sretensky Monastery, in an accessible form, the initial knowledge necessary for those who are preparing for the Sacrament of Baptism or are just beginning to live is given Orthodox life. The book presents the main provisions of our faith, talks about the Sacraments, the commandments of God and prayer.

When I have to baptize an adult, most often I perform the sacrament of Baptism without godparents. Because godparents, or godparents, are necessarily needed only for children. When an adult is baptized, he himself can say that he believes in the Lord Jesus Christ as his Savior and wants to accept Holy Baptism to save your soul. He himself can answer the priest’s questions and promise fidelity to Christ. Of course, it is good when next to the adult person being baptized there is an Orthodox church person who can become his successor and help him take his first steps in the temple and teach him the basics of faith. But I repeat, for an adult it is not necessary to have godparents.

Why are receivers needed at all? Godparents are those people who, due to the minority of their godchildren, make vows of Holy Baptism for them, a promise of fidelity to God. For their spiritual children, they renounce Satan, unite with Christ and confess their faith, reading the Creed for them. We baptize most people in infancy, that is, at an age when the child does not yet have conscious faith and cannot answer how he believes. His godparents do this for him. We baptize children according to the faith of their recipients and according to the faith of their parents as the closest people. Therefore, both bear a huge responsibility. Godparents are not just family friends, they are not some kind of “wedding generals” standing at the sacrament with an “Honorary Witness” ribbon, as happens at weddings. No, godparents are very responsible persons; they become guarantors before God for the souls of their godchildren. At the moment of baptism, together with their parents, in front of the Cross and the Gospel lying on a lectern, they make a promise to God Himself. What promise? That they will make every effort so that the newly baptized baby grows up as a believer, Orthodox person. Their duty now is to pray for their spiritual children, teach them prayers, instruct them in the Orthodox faith and take them to church to receive communion, and then, after seven years, to confess. So that when their godson reaches adulthood, he already knows how to pray to God, knows what we believe in and why we go to church. Of course, the greatest responsibility for the Christian upbringing of children lies with the parents, but godparents can also greatly influence their godchildren and become their spiritual teachers and mentors.

Many parents approach the Baptism of their children quite formally and choose godparents in the same formal manner.

Now a little about the sad things. Most modern godparents are very poorly prepared. Unfortunately, many parents approach the sacrament of Baptism of their children completely formally and choose godparents in the same formal manner. After all, a godfather should not just be good person, communication with whom we enjoy, our friend or relative - he must be an Orthodox person, churchgoer and knowledgeable of his faith. How can we teach someone the basics of faith if we ourselves don’t even know the very basics, haven’t read the Gospel, don’t know prayers? Indeed, in any field, if a person knows something well, for example, knows how to drive a car, work on a computer, solve mathematical problems, do repairs, he can teach this to others, pass on his knowledge. And if he himself knows nothing in this area, who can he teach?

If you are godparents and feel a lack of knowledge in the spiritual field (and none of us can say that he has fully studied the Orthodox faith, for it is an inexhaustible reservoir of spiritual wisdom), it is necessary to fill this gap. You need to educate yourself. Believe me, there is nothing complicated about this, especially now, when no one forbids us to read any spiritual literature and when books, brochures, and CDs telling about the Orthodox faith are sold in all churches and bookstores. The Lord reveals himself to everyone who turns to Him, at any age. My grandfather was baptized at the age of 70 and then mastered the basics of the Orthodox faith so well that he could even teach and mentor others.

Start off spiritual education you need to start with the very beginning, basic books, such as “The Law of God”, “First Steps in the Orthodox Church” and others. You definitely need to read the Gospel; you can start with the “Gospel of Mark”, it is the shortest, only 16 chapters, and was written specifically for new pagan Christians.

The godfather must live according to the commandments of God, pray to God and receive communion

The recipient is obliged to know the Creed and read it at baptism, in this prayer book in short form stated orthodox doctrine, and the godfather must know what he believes in. And of course, the godfather must live according to God’s commandments, pray to God and receive communion. According to church canons, a child is entitled to one godfather, of the same gender as the person being baptized, but our Russian tradition presupposes two godparents - a man and a woman. They must not be married to each other. Godparents then cannot marry or marry their godchildren. The child's father and mother cannot be his godparents, but other relatives: grandparents, uncles and aunts, brothers and sisters may well become godparents. Recipients, preparing for the sacrament of Baptism, must confess and partake of the Holy Mysteries of Christ.

As you know, when accepting Christianity, a person goes through a wonderful ritual -. According to tradition, godmother and father, or one of them, are required for baptism.

What should godparents be like?

The very first sacred act in a person’s life is baptism. Godparents are the most important people after parents who should assist in the spiritual upbringing of the child, become support and support. In fact, they are family members. Their responsibilities are not limited to giving gifts and maintaining communication with his family. Their main function is the spiritual development of the godson, initiation into the faith and church.

When choosing godparents, you need to remember that the baptism ceremony is carried out once and the child cannot be baptized, therefore, it will not be possible to change godparents. The Church makes an exception only if the godfather has changed his faith or leads a blatantly immoral, unpious lifestyle.

A child may have both godparents or only one, but in this case he must be of the same gender as the godson.

Becoming a godparent for several children is allowed, but the godparent must evaluate his strength, whether he can cope with his main responsibility, whether he has enough time and attention to raise all of his children accordingly.

Who is prohibited from becoming a godfather according to the canons of the Orthodox Church

Can't become godparents people who took monastic vows. There are also restrictions for godparents. The boy must be 15 years old at the time of accepting the duties of godfather, the girl who has decided to be the mother must be 13 years old. Parents, relatives or adoptive parents cannot become godparents for a child. There is a ban on intimate relationships between godparents, so spouses or people planning to get married should not become godparents of the same child.

Since godparents must initiate the godson into the church, they must be baptized. Non-believers and unbaptized people cannot become .

Non-Orthodox and non-Orthodox people are also prohibited from becoming godparents. An exception can only be if there are no Orthodox Christians in the environment, but a person of a different faith wants, and there is no doubt about his ability to raise a child as a highly moral and spiritually developed person.

It is unacceptable to take mentally ill people and morally fallen people as godparents.

IN various sources An esoteric and near-religious orientation can be found in a number of other prohibitions. However, it is worth remembering that baptism is a rite that obeys the laws of the Orthodox faith, and church ministers and true believers know it best. However, only parents can decide what information to rely on.

Be godmother of the child- a difficult but very honorable task. There are many misconceptions and speculations associated with the sacrament of baptism. One of the questions frequently asked to the priest is: “Is it possible to be a godmother several times?” The Church gives a direct and monosyllabic answer to this.

The role of the godmother in the life of a child

Parents choose close, time-tested people to play the role of “spiritual mother” for their child. Most often she becomes a family friend or relative.

The future godmother must meet a number of parameters:

• be a baptized Orthodox Christian;
• be a believer;
• know the history, basic canons and dogmas of Christianity;
• be a responsible and decent person;
• love children.

It is not forbidden to invite a woman to play the role of godmother if you yourself are the “spiritual parents” of her child. In this case, you will become godfathers for each other.

The main purpose of godparents is spiritual, church mentoring. Their duty is to introduce the godson to Orthodox traditions, take him to church and give wise worldly advice in difficult situations.

Who should not be taken as a godmother?

You should not take an unbeliever and a frivolous person as your godmother. Very rarely does the church allow people of a different religion to be chosen as “spiritual parents.”

It is impossible for godparents to be spouses or a couple in love. Relationships between godfathers should be exclusively platonic and spiritual.

The future godmother must certainly be baptized and a member of the church.

How many times can you be a godmother?

There is a belief that a woman should not baptize same-sex children several times. This is a misconception, just like the idea that a boy should be baptized first, and only then a girl.

If you are invited to become a godmother for the second or even third time, you can safely agree. Orthodox faith does not impose a limit on the number of godchildren. However, when agreeing to such a responsible step, you must clearly assess your strengths and capabilities.

Being a godmother means taking an active part in the life of a child, supporting him both morally and financially. And the most important thing is to introduce them to the faith and bring them into the fold of the church.

In addition, on the day of the Great Sacrament, the godmother must give her godson (goddaughter) a cross and a chain. The size and type of metal from which it is made does not matter, the main thing is that the cross is of a traditional Orthodox shape.

It is very good if, in addition to worldly gifts, it is the godmother who presents the child with his first Bible and personalized icon.

Think about whether you have enough energy and time for several children. Even if you quarrel with your godson’s parents, you will still remain the “spiritual mother” of their child and, according to the Orthodox faith, you will be responsible for him before God.

Sources:

• Is it possible to be a godparent to several children?

Is it possible to refuse to participate in Baptism? They say that if you refuse to be a godfather, then you refuse the cross.

Of course, it is not worth giving up the cross that the Lord gives to every person to strengthen his spiritual strength. Yes, this is impossible, because, refusing one cross, a person immediately receives a new one, which most often turns out to be heavier than the previous one. However, the duties of godparents can hardly be considered a moral test from which it is a sin to refuse.

The very name “godparents” (in the rite of the sacrament of Baptism they are called more neutrally - godparents) shows that their responsibilities are very serious. They consist in caring about the right spiritual development godson, in his upbringing in accordance with the moral principles of the Orthodox faith. Godparents guarantee before God that their godson or daughter will grow up to be a decent, worthy, believing person, that he or she will feel the need to live a full life church life. In addition, godparents are obliged to help their godchildren with ordinary everyday needs, to provide them not only spiritual, but also material assistance.

If some circumstances do not allow you to confidently accept such responsibility, if there is no sincere love in your heart for the intended godson, it is better to refuse the honorary offer to become a godfather.

Two years ago, my relatives asked me to become a godmother. Now they demand gifts from me, tell me where and what to buy, without asking what my current situation is. financial situation what I can or cannot buy. What should I do?

Perhaps we should remind our godfathers of the Russian proverb: “Stretch your legs according to your clothes.” By becoming a godmother, you, first of all, accepted the responsibility to raise your godson in the spirit of Christian values. These, by the way, include moderation in meeting material needs. Try to conscientiously fulfill this basic duty: teach your child to pray, read the Gospel with him, explaining its meaning, attend divine services. Gifts, especially those that bring spiritual benefit and delight the child, are, of course, also a good thing. But you did not undertake any obligation to fully replace your natural parents. In addition, another proverb is true: “There is no judgment.”

Can my sister, whose son I baptized, become the godmother of my child?

Maybe. There are no canonical obstacles to this.

My husband and I are not married. But we became godparents of our relative, who was baptized as an adult. I didn’t immediately get into the ritual, but then I found out that it wasn’t possible. And now our marriage is falling apart. What to do?!

The circumstance you are talking about can under no circumstances be grounds for divorce. On the contrary, try to save your marriage. If this fails, together with ex-husband continue to diligently fulfill your duties as godparents.

What should the child’s parents do if his godfather has forgotten about his godson and does not fulfill his duties? What should I do?

If the godfather is a relative or close friend family, it is worth reminding him of the responsibility that he bears before God for the correct Christian upbringing of his godson. If the godfather turned out to be random, and even not at all church man, you only have yourself to blame for your frivolous attitude towards choosing a receiver.

In this case, the parents themselves must diligently do what the godfather is obliged to do: raise the child in the spirit of Christian piety, accustom him to participate in divine services, and introduce him to the cultural wealth of the Orthodox Church.

Can I adopt my godson's child?

You can; canonical obstacles There is no need to adopt a godson child.

We decided to take relatives as our son’s godparents: our baby’s uncle and cousin, between them they are father and daughter. Please clarify, is this allowed? Let me explain that the choice was made consciously, and these are the people, in my opinion, who can be spiritual mentors for our child.

Your choice is quite acceptable if the intended godmother is not a minor child. After all, the adoptive parents take on adult responsibility; they are obliged to raise their godson in the spirit of Christian values, which means they themselves must know what these values ​​are, love the Church, worship, and live a church life.

Is it possible, being already godfather the eldest child in the family, and also become the godfather of the youngest?

If the godfather responsibly and conscientiously fulfills his duties towards his godson, then he may well become a godfather for his godson. younger brother (Bulgakov S.V. A clergyman's handbook. M., 1913. P. 994).

Please tell me whether siblings can be godparents. And one more thing: can a 12-year-old girl be a godmother?

Siblings can be godparents of the same child. A twelve-year-old girl can also become a godmother only if she was raised in Orthodox tradition, has a strong faith, knows the doctrine of the Church and understands the godfather’s responsibility for the fate of his godson.

Are there dogmatic or canonical obstacles to nepotism between spouses; in other words, can my wife and I become godparents to our friends’ child? Can godfathers and godfathers who were not married at the time of Baptism subsequently become husband and wife? I heard that there is no consensus in the Church on this matter.

Article 211 of the Nomocanon prohibits a husband and wife from being children of the same child. However, some decrees of the highest ecclesiastical authority of the Russian Orthodox Church (see about this: Bulgakov S.V. A clergyman's handbook. M., 1913. P. 994) cancel the specified requirement of Nomocanon. In the current situation, in my opinion, we should adhere to more ancient tradition, especially since in the Russian Orthodox Church it was considered the only correct one for a long time. In the case where the child’s parents absolutely desire to have spouses as his adoptive parents, they should submit a corresponding petition to the Ruling Bishop of the diocese in which the sacrament of Baptism is supposed to be performed.

Recipients of the same child who were not married at the time of Baptism are not considered to be spiritually related. Therefore, in the future they can enter into legal marriage without any obstacles ( Bulgakov S.V. Handbook of a clergyman. M., 1913. P. 1184).

In fairness, it should be noted that there is an opposite opinion on this matter, which was held, for example, by St. Philaret of Moscow. If a priest refuses to marry the children of the same child, one should also contact the Ruling Bishop of the diocese where the wedding is expected to take place.

Can the godfather have other godchildren?

It is allowed to have any number of godchildren. However, when inviting a godfather for your child, you should think about whether he can adequately fulfill his duties, whether he has enough love, mental strength and material resources for the proper Christian upbringing of his godson.

At my cousin 10 years ago, a son was born with a congenital heart defect. The doctors said that the situation was bad, and the sister decided to baptize him right in the hospital. She was lying in a special box, where no one except doctors was allowed. Only the priest was allowed in to baptize the child. I was only told later that I was registered as a godfather. Later, in Moscow, the child underwent surgery, he got back on his feet, thank God. And in January, my friend’s son was born, and he invited me to become godfather. Can I be a godfather?

I repeat, it is allowed to have any number of godchildren. However, it should be remembered that the responsibilities of godparents are very serious. Baptism is a church sacrament in which Divine grace itself acts. Therefore, you were not just “registered” as a godparent, perhaps without your knowledge, but you were given responsibility for the correct Christian upbringing of your godson. Having several godchildren is quite difficult. But, if you feel love for these children, the Lord will give you spiritual strength and the opportunity to become a worthy godfather for them.

Newspaper “Orthodox Faith” No. 7 (459), 2012