Communion at Easter is considered good for health. Confession before Easter

Isn't it time for us all to learn how to confess correctly? Questions are answered by Archimandrite Markell (Pavuk).

– A large number of people do not know what to repent. Many go to confession and remain silent, waiting for leading questions from the priests. Why is this happening and what needs to be repented of Orthodox Christian?

– Usually people do not know what to repent of, for several reasons:

1. They lead a scattered life (busy with thousands of things), and they have no time to take care of themselves, look into their soul and see what is wrong there. Such people in our time 90%, if not more.

2. Many suffer from high self-esteem, that is, they are proud, and therefore are more inclined to notice and condemn other people's sins and shortcomings than their own.

3. Neither their parents, nor teachers, nor priests taught them what and how to repent.

And an Orthodox Christian should repent first of all of what his conscience convicts him of. It is best to build a confession according to the Ten Commandments of God. That is, during Confession, we first need to talk about what we have sinned against God (these can be the sins of unbelief, lack of faith, superstition, godliness, oaths), then repent of sins against neighbors (disrespect, inattention to parents, disobedience to them, deceit, cunning, condemnation, anger against neighbors, hostility, arrogance, pride, vanity, stinginess, theft, tempting others to sin, fornication, etc.). I advise you to familiarize yourself with the book "To Help the Penitent", compiled by St. Ignatius (Bryanchaninov). In the work of the elder John Krestyankin, an example of confession according to the Ten Commandments of God is presented. Focusing on these works, you can make your own informal confession.

– How much detail do you need to tell about your sins at confession?

– It all depends on the degree of your repentance for sins. If a person in his heart has gained the determination not to return to this or that sin, then he tries to uproot it and therefore describes everything to the smallest detail. And if a person repents formally, then he gets something like: "I have sinned in deed, word, thought." The exception to this rule is the sins of fornication. IN this case there is no need to describe the details. If the priest feels that a person is indifferent even to such sins, then he can ask additional questions in order to shame such a person at least a little and move him to true repentance.

– If you don’t feel light after confession, what does it mean?

- This may indicate that there was no genuine repentance, confession was made without contrition of the heart, but only a formal enumeration of sins with an unwillingness to change one's life and not sin again. True, sometimes the Lord does not immediately give a feeling of lightness, so that a person does not become proud and immediately fall into the same sins again. Ease also does not come immediately if a person confesses old, deeply rooted sins. For lightness to come, it is necessary to shed a lot of tears of repentance.

– If you attended confession at Vespers, and after the service you managed to sin, is it necessary to go to confession again in the morning?

- If this prodigal sins, anger or drunkenness, then you definitely need to repent of them again and even ask the priest for penance, so as not to commit so quickly past sins. If sins of another kind are admitted (condemnation, laziness, verbosity), then it follows during the evening or morning prayer rule sincerely ask for forgiveness from the Lord for the committed faults, and at the next confession, confess them.

– If at confession I forgot to mention some sin, and then after a while I remembered it, do I need to go back to the priest and talk about it?

- If there is such an opportunity and the priest is not very busy, then he will even rejoice for your diligence, and if this is not possible, then you need to write down this sin so as not to forget it again, and repent of it during the next confession.

How can you learn to see your sins?

- A person begins to see his sins when he stops judging other people. In addition, to see your infirmity, as he writes Reverend Simeon New Theologian teaches the careful fulfillment of the commandments of God. As long as a person fulfills one thing and neglects the other, he will not be able to feel what a wound sins inflict on his soul.

– What to do with a sense of shame at confession, with a desire to obscure, hide your sin? Will this hidden sin forgiven by God?

– Shame at confession is a natural feeling, which indicates that a person has a living conscience. Worse, when there is no shame. But the main thing is that shame should not reduce our confession to formality, when we confess one thing and hide the other. It is unlikely that the Lord will be pleased with such a confession. Yes, and every priest always feels when a person hides something and formalizes his confession. For him, this child ceases to be dear, one for which he is always ready to pray fervently. And vice versa, regardless of the gravity of the sin, the deeper the repentance, the more the priest rejoices for the penitent. Not only the priest, but also the angels in heaven rejoice for a sincerely penitent person.

– Is it necessary to confess a sin that you will absolutely commit in the near future? How to hate sin?

– The Holy Fathers teach that the greatest sin is unrepentant sin. Even if we do not feel the strength in ourselves to fight sin, we still need to resort to the Sacrament of Penance. With God's help, if not immediately, then gradually we will be able to overcome the sin that has taken root in us. But don't overestimate yourself. If we lead a right spiritual life, we can never feel completely sinless. The fact is that we are all docile, that is, we very easily fall into all sorts of sins, no matter how many times we repent of them. Each of our confessions is a kind of shower (bath) for the soul. If we constantly take care of the purity of our body, then all the more we need to take care of the purity of our soul, which is much more precious than the body. So, no matter how many times we sin, we must not hesitate to run to confession. And if a person does not repent of repeated sins, then they will entail other, more serious offenses. For example, someone is accustomed to deceive on trifles all the time. If he does not repent of this, then in the end he can not only deceive, but also betray other people. Remember what happened to Judas. He first quietly stole money from the donation box, and then betrayed Christ Himself.

A person can hate sin only when he fully feels the sweetness of the grace of God. As long as a person's sense of grace is weak, it is difficult for him not to fall into the sin of which he has recently repented. The sweetness of sin in such a person is stronger than the sweetness of grace. Therefore, the holy fathers and especially Reverend Seraphim Sarovsky so insists that the main goal of the Christian life should be the acquisition of the grace of the Holy Spirit.

– If a priest tore up a note with sins without looking into it, are these sins considered forgiven?

– If the priest is perspicacious and knows how to read what is written in the note without looking into it, then, thank God, all sins are forgiven. If the priest does this because of his haste, indifference and inattention, then it is better to go to confession to another or, if this is not possible, confess your sins aloud, without writing them down.

- Does it exist in Orthodox Church general confession? How to treat this practice?

– General confession, during which they read special prayers from the Trebnik, usually held before an individual confession. Saint righteous John Kronstadtsky practiced general confession without individual confession, but he did this by necessity because of the multitude of people who came to him for consolation. Purely physically, due to human weakness, he did not have enough strength to listen to everyone. In Soviet times, such confessions were also sometimes practiced, when one temple was for a whole city or district. Now, when the number of temples and clergy has increased significantly, there is no need to make do with one common confession without individual. We are ready to listen to everyone, if only there was sincere repentance.

Archimandrite Markell (Pavuk)
Interviewed by Natalya Goroshkova
Orthodox Life

Viewed (3388) times

IN Orthodox catechism the following definition of this sacrament is given: “Repentance is a sacrament in which the one who confesses his sins, with a visible expression of forgiveness from the priest, is invisibly absolved from sins by Jesus Christ Himself.”

Each of us, at least a few times in our lives, had to admit we were wrong, saying a simple, but such, sometimes difficult to pronounce, word “sorry”. But if an unchurched person asks for forgiveness only from those whom he offended, then a Christian still asks for forgiveness from God.

Confession is not a conversation about one's shortcomings, doubts, and not a story to a confessor about one's life, it is a sacrament, and not just a pious custom. Confession is an ardent repentance of the heart, a thirst for purification.

What does the concept of confession mean, and how to prepare for it, we will try to figure it out with the help of Holy Scripture and the holy fathers.

Confession is a change of mind

The words "repentance" or "confession", unfortunately, do not accurately reflect the meaning of this sacrament. In Russian, to confess means to reveal one's sins. IN Greek the sacrament of confession is called "metanoia" - a change of mind. This means that her goal is not only to ask for forgiveness, but also to change her mind with the help of God.

The sermon of Christ calls for a change in the way of thinking and way of life, the rejection of sinful deeds and thoughts. A synonym for repentance is the word "conversion" often found in the Bible: "Turn every one from his evil way and correct your ways and your deeds" (Jer. 18:11).

To turn, explains Metropolitan Anthony of Sourozh, “means to turn away from many things that had a value for us only because they were pleasant or useful to us. Conversion manifests itself, first of all, in a change in the scale of values: when God is in the center of everything, everything else takes on new places, gets a new depth. All that is God's, all that belongs to Him, is positive and real. Anything outside of Him has no value or meaning. It is an active, positive state of going in the right direction.”

Metropolitan Hilarion (Alfeev) notes: “Repentance is not just repentance. Judas, having betrayed the Lord, subsequently repented, but did not bring repentance. He regretted what he had done, but did not find the strength in himself either to ask for forgiveness from the Lord, or to do something good to correct the evil that he had committed. He failed to change his life, to embark on a path in which he could make amends for his former sins. This is the difference between him and the Apostle Peter: he denied Christ, but throughout his subsequent life, the feat of confession and martyrdom, he proved his love for God and atoned for his sin a thousandfold.

The establishment of the sacrament of confession

Repentance before God, sometimes with all the people, is a common practice, widely found in the days of the Old Testament. We can remember the righteous Noah, who called the people to repentance. We come across positive examples of repentance: the prophet Jonah called out to the Ninevites, proclaiming their doom. And the inhabitants heard his words and repented of their sins, they propitiated God with their prayers and received salvation (Jonah 3; 3).

The sacrament of confession in Christian understanding originates from apostolic times. The Acts of the Apostles says that "many of those who believed came, confessing and revealing their deeds" (Acts 19; 18).

IN Holy Scripture repentance is a necessary condition for salvation: “unless you repent, you will all likewise perish” (Luke 13:3). And it is joyfully accepted by the Lord and pleasing to Him: “So in heaven there will be more joy over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous who have no need of repentance” (Luke 15:7).

It was to the apostles and their successors, the bishops, and through them to the priests, that the Lord gave the right and opportunity to forgive human sins: “Receive the Holy Spirit; and in the same way you hold, hold on (on whom you leave, on that they will remain) ”(John 20:22-23).

Confession in the first centuries did not have a strict following, like other sacraments. IN different churches met different practices associated with local customs. But even then it was possible to distinguish several main components that were found almost everywhere. Among them, first of all, it is necessary to note a personal confession before a pastor or bishop and a confession before the whole church community, which was practiced until the end of the 4th century, when Patriarch of Constantinople Nectarios abolished the position of priest-confessor, who dealt with the affairs of public Penance.

How to prepare?

A common mistake many Christians make is the vicious practice of remembering their sins while standing in line. Preparation for confession should begin long before the sacrament. Within a few days, the one who is preparing must analyze his life, remember all the deeds, thoughts, deeds that confuse his soul.

Preparation for confession does not consist in possibly fully remembering and even writing down your sin. It consists in reaching that state of concentration, seriousness and prayer, in which, as in the light, our sins will become clearly visible. The confessor should bring to the confessor not a list, but a feeling of repentance, not a detailed account of his life, but a contrite heart.

Metropolitan Anthony of Surozh in one of his sermons noted: “Sometimes people come and read a long list of sins - which I know from the list, because I have the same books that they have. And I stop them, I say: “You are not confessing your sins, you are confessing the sins that can be found in the nomocanon, in prayer books. I need your confession, or rather, Christ needs your personal repentance, not general stereotyped repentance. You can't feel like you've been condemned by God to eternal torment because you haven't read evening prayers either he didn’t read the canons, or he didn’t fast like that.”

Metropolitan Hilarion (Alfeev) echoes Metropolitan Anthony: “Often at confession they speak not about their own sins, but about the sins of other people: son-in-law, mother-in-law, mother-in-law, daughter, son, parents, colleagues, neighbors. Sometimes a priest has to listen to stories with many actors, with stories about the sins and shortcomings of relatives and friends. All this has nothing to do with confession, because our relatives and friends will answer for their sins themselves, but we will have to answer for our sins. And if one of us does not develop relationships with relatives, colleagues, neighbors, then in preparation for confession, we must ask ourselves the question: what is my fault; what have I done wrong; What could I have done to change the situation for the better, but didn't? You should always look for your own fault first, and not blame your neighbors. Sometimes people come to complain about life. Something in life did not work out, a failure occurred, and a person comes to the priest to say how difficult it is for him. It must be remembered that a priest is not a psychotherapist, and a temple is not the place where one should come with a complaint. Of course, in some cases the priest must listen, console, encourage, but confession cannot be reduced to psychotherapy.”

The Monk Nikon of Optina, speaking of preparing for confession, advises his children “to delve deeper into themselves and carefully follow their thoughts, feelings and cry about the passionate, sinful feelings, desires, thoughts that we have, we must certainly expel them, as God objectionable, and, having driven out, by no means allow it into our hearts, for we cannot sing the song of the Lord in a passionate state.

An important aspect of preparation is pure heart. Wanting to confess, a Christian must wholeheartedly ask for forgiveness from those whom he offended, and forgive his offenders. Archimandrite John (Krestyankin) says the following about this: “Before we begin to repent, we must forgive everyone everything! Forgive without delay, now! Forgive for real, and not like this: "I forgave you, but I can't see you and I don't want to talk to you!" We must immediately forgive everyone and everything, as if there were no insults, grief and hostility! Only then can we hope to receive forgiveness from the Lord.”

/N. Losev. Prodigal son. 1882./

IN gospel parable about prodigal son the image of "repentance" is shown - changing oneself, rejecting sin. Confession (Sacrament of Repentance) is the sacrament of the Orthodox Church, during which the one who confesses his sins with sincere repentance receives permission and forgiveness of sins from God.

Confession of sins

To bring repentance for sins, it is necessary to understand and understand what sin is. Catholic tradition, dating back to Anselm of Canterbury, defines sin in a legal plane. Sin is perceived as breaking the law, committing a crime.

The Orthodox tradition has always treated sin as a disease, which was recorded in the decree VI ecumenical council. And in the liturgical practice of the Orthodox Church, such an understanding of sin is expressed in numerous prayers, the most famous of them in the rank of Confession. To a person who confesses his sins, it is said: “Hear, therefore, for thou hast come to the doctor’s clinic, so that thou shalt not go unhealed.” And the Greek word amartia itself, translated as “sin”, has several more meanings, one of which is a disease.

St. Gregory of Nyssa speaks of sin thus: “Sin is not an essential property of our nature, but a deviation from it. Just as disease and ugliness are not inherent in our nature, but are unnatural, so the activity directed towards evil must be recognized as a distortion of the good that is innate in us.

He is echoed Reverend Ephraim Sirin: "Sin does violence to nature."

“Repentance is born from love for God: it is standing before Someone, and not thinking about something. This is an appeal to the Personality, and not an impersonal assessment of what happened. The son in the parable of the prodigal son does not just talk about his sins - he repents. Here is love for the father, and not just hatred for oneself and one's deeds. IN church language repentance is the antonym of despair. You can’t go to God with the feeling “here I will repent and everything will be fine.” Repentance is connected with the expectation of healing help from outside, from the loving grace of God. Deacon Andrei Kuraev.

How often should you go to confession?

This question does not have a clear answer. The frequency of confession should be determined by the Christian himself, after consulting with his confessor. Metropolitan of Saratov and Volsk Longin in one of the broadcasts answered the question of the viewers in such a way: “As necessary, this is very individual. If there is a skill, then every time the heart hurts about some kind of sin. Someone needs it several times a month, someone - once a week, someone more often, someone less often. It is necessary to confess so often that the voice of conscience always resounds loudly in the human heart. If it starts to subside, then something is wrong.

If the confessed sin continues to torment, and the pain from it does not subside, you should not be embarrassed by this, Vladyka said. “Sin wounds the human soul. It takes time for any wound to heal, it cannot just go on and on. We are people, we have a conscience, we have a soul, and after the wound inflicted on it, of course, it hurts. Sometimes all my life. There are such situations, such sins, the wound from which remains in the human heart for a very long time, even if the person repented and received forgiveness from God.

But if these sins were no longer repeated, then there is no need to mention them again at confession, Metropolitan Longin noted. “Every sin, we know, is traditionally atoned for by penance. And this memory of sin, a mournful, painful memory, may well be perceived as a penance from God.

Children's confession

At what age should children confess, how to tell and prepare the baby for the first repentance - these questions concern many Orthodox parents. Archpriest Maxim Kozlov advises not to rush in such cases: “You cannot demand that from the age of seven all children come to confession. The norm that children should confess before Communion from the age of seven has been established since the synodal era and from earlier centuries. As, if I am not mistaken, Father Vladimir Vorobyov wrote in his book on the sacrament of Repentance, for many and many children today, physiological maturation is so much ahead of spiritual and psychological that most of today's children are not ready to confess at the age of seven. Isn't it time to say that this age is set by the confessor and the parent absolutely individually in relation to the child?

At seven years old, and some even a little earlier, they see the difference between good and bad deeds, but it is too early to say that this is a conscious repentance. Only the chosen, subtle, delicate natures are able to experience this at such an early age. There are amazing kids who at the age of five or six have a responsible moral consciousness, but most often these are other things. Or parents' motivations associated with the desire to have an additional educational tool (it often happens that when Small child misbehaving, naive and kind mother asks the priest to confess him, thinking that if he repents, he will obey). Or some kind of ape in relation to adults on the part of the child himself: they stand, they approach, the priest says something to them.

Nothing good comes from this. Most moral consciousness wakes up much later. But let yourself later. Let them come at nine, ten, when they have major degree adulthood and responsibility for their lives. In fact, the earlier a child confesses, the worse it is for him - apparently, it is not in vain that children are not charged with sins until they are seven years old. Only from a fairly later age do they perceive confession as a confession, and not as a list of what was said by mom or dad and written down on paper. And this formalization that occurs in the child, in contemporary practice our church life is a pretty dangerous thing."

Why do you need a priest for confession?

Confession is not a conversation. The priest is not required to say anything. He is obliged to listen, he is obliged to understand whether a person sincerely repents. Giving advice is not always appropriate. Metropolitan Anthony of Surozh said in one of his words about confession: “Sometimes an honest priest must say: “I was sick with you with all my heart during your confession, but I can’t tell you anything about it. I will pray for you, but I cannot give advice.”

Each confession is a promise to make every effort not to return to confessed sin in the future. The priest is only a witness to your oath of allegiance to God.

The priest is endowed with the power from God to forgive those of our sins in which we bring sincere repentance. This heavy burden of responsibility and authority Christ gave to His apostles.

Why are they not allowed to take Communion?

“It’s better for you not to take communion today…” Such penance imposed by a priest is often perceived as an undeserved punishment. What are the reasons for not allowing a person to take communion? Archpriest Konstantin Ostrovsky, rector of the Assumption Church in the city of Krasnogorsk, Moscow Region, Dean of the Churches of the Krasnogorsk District of the Moscow Diocese, answers.

The most dangerous thing is formalism

Father Konstantin, sometimes priests do not allow communion because a person has fasted not for three days, but for two. Some refuse to take communion during Bright Week or at Christmas time, because at this time the parishioners do not fast. On the other hand, there is an opinion that fasting before communion is not necessary at all - according to church calendar in a year and so about half of the fasting days.

Breaking the fast in itself does not refer to such grave sins and conditions in which a person should be prohibited from partaking of the Holy Mysteries of Christ. church rules, including about fasting, this is a gift of the Church to her children, and not a burden that one has to bear with anguish so that the priest does not scold. If a person, for some reason beyond his control, is not able to use the gift of the Church, this is a subject for patience and humility. If, due to frivolity, or partiality, or forgetfulness, a person has violated the rule given by the Church, this is a reason for repentance, but not yet for a ban. I advise all violators of fasting and other similar church regulations not to excommunicate themselves from communion without permission, but to come to the service and bring the matter to the decision of the confessor. And decisions may be different, but they should never be formal. The task of the priest is not to observe the rule, but to bring benefit to a person, or at least not harm. It happens that a person is so distracted and ate too much (even if lean food) on the eve of communion, that he himself feels the need to postpone communion. Well, let him put it off, fast, and then take communion. And it happens that someone, out of forgetfulness, put sour cream in the soup. I don't think strictness is appropriate in such cases.

As for the fast before communion, I think it should not be abolished altogether, but the severity and duration of the fast should be appropriate for the situation: different people in different circumstances different advice should be given. It is one thing when a person, for some reason, takes communion once a year, and quite another thing when on all Sundays and holidays. Both health and lifestyle habits matter. For someone, giving up meat and dairy is a real feat, but for someone sunflower oil in potatoes - an indulgence to gluttony.

The worst thing about fasting is formalism. Some demand scrupulous observance of what they read in the Typicon, others demand the abolition of strict rules. But in fact, let the rules remain as a norm, a guideline, and how and to what extent to apply them, let the priest decide in each specific case especially, praying for a person, driven by love for him and a desire to help him on the path of salvation.

As for communion on Bright Week and on the Holy Days after Christmas, then, of course, if a liturgy is served in the Church, then it is possible to receive communion. How about a post? For those who ask me, I advise you to eat all kinds of food these days, but do not overeat. But I don't want to impose anything on anyone; the worst thing, I think, in this area is the disputes over the letter. If someone wants to eat greens for Easter, there is nothing wrong with that, just don’t be proud of it and don’t condemn those who eat differently. And let those who do not fast strictly, do not consider the fasters backward and unspiritual.

Let me give you an extensive quote from the Apostle Paul: “... Some people are sure that they can eat everything, but the weak eat vegetables. Who eats, do not humiliate the one who does not eat; and whoever does not eat, do not condemn him who eats, because God has accepted him. Who are you, condemning someone else's slave? Before his Lord he stands or falls. And he will be raised, for God is mighty to raise him up. One distinguishes day from day, and another judges every day equally. Everyone act according to the assurance of his mind. He who distinguishes the days distinguishes for the Lord; and whoever does not distinguish the days does not distinguish for the Lord. Whoever eats, eats for the Lord, for he gives thanks to God; and whoever does not eat, does not eat for the Lord, and gives thanks to God. ... And what are you judging your brother? Or are you also, that you humiliate your brother? We will all stand before the Judgment Seat of Christ. ... Let us no longer judge each other, but rather judge how not to give a brother a chance to stumbling or temptation. I know and am confident in the Lord Jesus that there is nothing unclean in itself; only to him who considers something unclean, it is unclean to him. But if your brother is grieved over food, then you no longer act out of love. Do not destroy with your food the one for whom Christ died. … For the kingdom of God is not food and drink, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit” (Rom. 14:2-6, 10, 13-15, 17).

The grounds for prohibiting communion for a longer or shorter period can only be either a serious sin (fornication, murder, theft, witchcraft, denial of Christ, obvious heresy, etc.), or a moral state that is completely incompatible with communion (for example, refusal to reconcile with repentant offender).

Legalization of non-churchness

In the nineties, many priests did not allow people living in an unmarried marriage to receive communion. Patriarch Alexy II pointed out the inadmissibility of this. But what about those living in a so-called civil marriage? Formally - fornication, but in fact it can not always be called such.

Indeed, the late Patriarch Alexy II pointed out the inadmissibility of excommunicating people from communion only on the grounds that they live in an unmarried marriage. Of course, pious Orthodox Christians will not begin married life without a church blessing, which in our time is just taught in the sacrament of marriage. But there are many cases when unbaptized people entered into a legal marriage, have children, love each other, and remain faithful. And so, let's say, the wife believed in Christ and was baptized, but the husband has not yet. What to do? Is their marriage now turned into fornication and must be destroyed? Of course not. Yes, the apostle Paul writes about this: “If any brother has an unbelieving wife, and she agrees to live with him, then he should not leave her; and a wife who has an unbelieving husband, and he agrees to live with her, must not leave him ”(1 Cor. 7: 12-13). Surely the fulfillment of the apostolic instruction should entail a prohibition in church communion? Moreover, in the first centuries of Christianity church wedding didn't exist at all. Christians entered into marriage with the knowledge of the bishop, but according to the laws of the country, and then, together with the whole community, they partake of the Holy Mysteries of Christ, this was the church recognition of their marriage. Church rank Marriage took shape gradually over several centuries and became universally obligatory for Christians entering into marriage only at the end of the first millennium.

Regarding "civil marriage", let's clarify the terminology. A civil marriage (without any quotes) is a marriage concluded according to the customs and laws of the people or state, to which the husband and wife belong. It is no accident that I use here the various terms "custom" and "law", "people" and "state" together, because in different time and in different places the legality of a marriage can be defined in different ways. How to treat people who live in a family way, but who have not legally formalized their relationship in any way? Can they be allowed to partake of the Holy Mysteries of Christ? In the vast majority of cases, such cohabitation is unacceptable from a church point of view, and people must either enter into a legal marriage, or part with their cohabitants, and only then receive permission for sins in the sacrament of confession and be accepted into church fellowship. But there are difficult situations when non-church people created a lawless family and children were born to them. Here is an example from life: people have been living as spouses for many years, consider themselves husband and wife, but the marriage has not been registered. They have three children. About two years ago, the wife believed in Christ and came to the Church, she was told that the marriage must be registered. She agrees, tries to persuade her husband, but he refuses, says that all his friends who have signed are already divorced, but he does not want to get divorced. Of course, I don’t agree with him, that is, I think that I need to sign, but he doesn’t come to me for advice. And his wife can't convince him. She goes to the temple, takes the children to communion (her husband even helps her with this), the children study with us in Sunday school. Really, in this situation, it would be necessary to forbid this woman to take communion or demand from her to destroy the family, even if it was unregistered? The rule requiring Christians to enter into marriages in accordance with state laws is wise and should, of course, be observed. But we must not forget that although the law is higher than lawlessness, love is still higher than the law.

For some serious sins (murder, practicing the occult), excommunication from communion is expected for almost 20 years. Nobody canceled these rules, but today they are practically not applied.

It seems to me that today long-term penance cannot fulfill its functions - healing the soul, reconciling it with God. In Byzantium it was possible. All the people lived there church life, and the one who committed a serious sin remained a member of the community that was gathered around the Church. Just imagine: everyone goes to the service, and he remains on the porch. He doesn’t go to the movies and he doesn’t lie on the sofa by the TV, but he stands on the porch and prays! After a while, he begins to enter the temple, but cannot receive communion. All these years of penance, he prayerfully repents, realizing his unworthiness. And what will happen today if we excommunicate a person from communion for five years? Not a member of the community, but most likely someone who came to confession for the first time in his life at the age of 40-50-60. As he did not go to church before, so now he will not. Moreover, “legally,” he will say: the priest did not allow me to take communion, so I lie at home, drink beer, and when the period of penance passes, I will go to take communion. It will be so, only not everyone will live to see the end of the penance, and of those who live, many will forget about God. That is, today, in modern conditions, imposing many years of penance on a person who first came to the temple, we essentially legalize his non-churchhood. Meaning? After all, a person who is in mortal sin and does not want to repent, change his life, and so cannot receive communion until repentance. If he has changed, laments about what he has done, I believe that even with the most serious sins, if it is forbidden for him to take communion, then not for long, especially for those who came for the first time.

The attitude towards church people should be more strict. Fortunately, church people not so often fall into serious mortal sins, but I remember the case when a permanent parishioner had an abortion, who had been going to the temple for many years, she took communion. Here penance was appropriate, and the woman did not grumble when she was appointed to her, a man has a conscience. But when a pensioner comes, whom her grandmother took to communion as a child, then she became a pioneer, a Komsomol member, lost her way, had an abortion, and 40 years later she thought about God, what kind of penance can there be? And even if an abortion was recently performed, but by a non-church woman who walked the ways of this world, and now she believed and repented, I also do not think that penance should be imposed on her. I note, by the way, that a priest can impose even small penances only with the consent of the penitent himself. Right church court only the ecclesiastical court itself and the ruling bishop have it. As for long-term penances, this is all the more not within the competence of the parish priest.

Communion should not be considered a feat

How often, in your opinion, should a layman take communion? Is it possible to take communion every day at Christmas time or Bright Week?

It is absolutely normal when the whole community gathers on a Sunday or other holiday for the liturgy and everyone partakes of the Holy Mysteries of Christ. True, this norm is forgotten by most of us. And daily communion was just not the norm, because the liturgy was not served every day. But since then a lot of water has flowed under the bridge, church customs have changed, and not only because of the lack of spirituality among the parishioners and the clergy, there are also factors that do not depend on specific people. Now, I think, it is impossible to introduce or even recommend general rules for all.

There are people who recognize themselves as Orthodox, who do not fall into serious mortal sins, who, however, take communion only three or four times a year and do not feel the need for more. I do not think that they should be forced or even persuaded to take communion more often. Although, as far as possible, I try to explain to all Christians the meaning and salvation of the Sacrament of the Body and Blood.

If Orthodox person communion on all Sundays and feast days, this is natural for a Christian. If for some reason it does not work out, let it be as it turns out. Once a month, it seems to me, every person can get out to the temple for communion, but if this is not possible, what can you do. The Lord welcomes the intention. Only it is not necessary to consider communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ a feat! If so, then it is better not to take communion at all. The body and blood of Christ is not our feat, but the mercy of God. But if someone wants to take communion several times in a row during the Bright Week, not in the order of achievement, but in simplicity, then what's wrong with that? If a person is not hindered by anything, I usually do not mind. But in order to constantly take communion every day, there must be serious reasons. In and of itself, this has never been a church norm. Here is St. Theophan the Recluse in last years communed every day of his life. Let everyone look at what really motivates him to extraordinary frequent communion: the grace of God or their own conceited fantasies. It is also good to consult with a confessor.

Confessors themselves must approach human souls with great care. I remember once I had to confess to an old woman (I was still a novice priest at that time), she said that she did not want to, but she took communion every day. "How so?" I asked. She replied that her spiritual father told her so. I tried to dissuade the old woman from such an absurd, in my opinion, feat, but the authority of the spiritual father prevailed. I don't know how it ended.

I have been asked the following question several times:

Can we take communion at Easter? What about Holy Week? Do we need to keep fasting to receive communion?

The question is good. However, it betrays a lack of a clear understanding of things. On Easter, it is not only possible, but even necessary, to take communion. In favor of this statement, I would like to summarize a number of arguments:

1. In the first centuries of the history of the Church, as we see in the canons and patristic writings, participation in the Liturgy without communion of the Holy Mysteries was simply unthinkable. (I advise you to read the article about this: " When and how should we take communion? .) However, over time, especially in our area, the level of piety and understanding among Christians began to decline, and the rules for preparing for the sacrament became stricter, in places even excessive (including double standards for clergy and laity). Despite this, communion at Easter was common practice, persisting to this day in all Orthodox countries. However, some postpone communion until Easter itself, as if someone is preventing them from approaching the Chalice every Sunday of Great Lent and throughout the year. Thus, ideally, we should take communion at every liturgy, especially on Maundy Thursday, when the Eucharist was instituted, on Pascha and on Pentecost, when the Church was born.

2. For those on whom penance is imposed because of some serious sin, some confessors are allowed to take communion (only) on Easter, after which, for some time, they continue to bear their penance. This practice, which, however, is not and should not be generally accepted, took place in ancient times, to help the penitent, to strengthen them spiritually, allowing them to join the joy of the holiday. On the other hand, allowing penitents to take communion on Pascha indicates that the mere passage of time and even the personal efforts of the penitent are not enough to save a person from sin and death. Indeed, for this it is necessary that the risen Christ Himself send light and strength to the soul of the penitent (just as Reverend Mary Egyptian, who led a dissolute life until the very last day of her sojourn in the world, was able to embark on the path of repentance in the desert only after communion with Christ). From this arose and spread in some places the erroneous idea that only thieves and fornicators receive communion on Pascha. But does the Church have a separate communion for thieves and fornicators, and another for those who lead a Christian life? Is not Christ the same at every liturgy throughout the year? Doesn't everyone partake of Him - priests, kings, beggars, robbers, and children? By the way, the word of St. John Chrysostom (at the end Easter matins) calls everyone without division to communion with Christ. His call "Fasting and non-fasting, rejoice now! The meal is plentiful: everyone is satisfied! Taurus is big and plump: no one leaves hungry!” explicitly refers to the communion of the Holy Mysteries. It is surprising that some read or listen to this word without understanding that we are not called to a meal with meat dishes, but to communion with Christ.

3. The dogmatic aspect of this problem is also extremely important. People are queuing to buy and eat lamb for Passover - for some, this is the only "biblical commandment" they keep in their lives (because the rest of the commandments do not suit them!). However, when the book of Exodus speaks of the slaughter of the Passover lamb, it refers to the Jewish Passover, where the lamb was a type of Christ the Lamb slain for us. Therefore, eating the Paschal lamb without communion with Christ means a return to Old Testament and refusal to acknowledge Christ"the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world"(John 1:29). In addition, people bake all kinds of Easter cakes or other dishes, which we call" Easter ". But don't we know that"Our Easter is Christ"(1 Cor 5:7)? Therefore, all these Paschal dishes should be a continuation, but not a replacement for the communion of the Holy Mysteries. This is not specifically said in churches, but we should all know that Easter is first of all the Liturgy and Communion of the Risen Christ.

4. Some also say that you cannot take communion on Easter, because then you will eat fast. But doesn't the priest do the same? Why, then, is the Paschal Liturgy celebrated, and after it is it blessed to eat dairy and meat? Isn't it clear that after communion everything can be eaten? Or, perhaps, someone perceives the Liturgy as a theatrical performance, and not as a call to communion with Christ? If eating fast food were incompatible with communion, then the Liturgy would not be celebrated on Easter and Christmas, or there would be no breaking the fast. Moreover, this applies to the entire liturgical year.

5. And now about communion in Holy Week. Canon 66 of Trullo Council (691) prescribes that Christians" enjoyed the Holy Mysteries" throughout the whole Bright Week , even though it is continuous. Thus, communion is started without fasting. Otherwise, there would be no liturgy, or fasting would continue. The idea of the need to fast before communion concerns, first of all, the Eucharistic fast before receiving the Holy Mysteries. Such a strict Eucharistic fast is prescribed for at least six or even nine hours (not like Catholics, who take communion an hour after the meal). If we are talking about a multi-day fast, then the seven-week fast that we kept is quite enough, and there is no need - moreover, it is even forbidden - to continue fasting. At the end of Bright Week, we will fast on Wednesdays and Fridays, as well as during the other three multi-day posts. After all, priests do not fast during Bright Week before communion, and then it is not clear where the idea that the laity should fast these days comes from! Nevertheless, in my opinion, only those who have observed the entire Great Lent, who lead a whole, balanced Christian life, always strive for Christ (and not only by fasting) and perceive the sacrament not as a reward for their works, but as a cure for spiritual diseases.

Thus, every Christian is called to prepare for the sacrament and ask for it from the priest, especially at Easter. If the priest refuses without any reason (in the event that a person does not have such sins for which penance is due), but uses all sorts of excuses, then, in my opinion, the believer can go to another temple, to another priest ( only if the reason for leaving for another parish is valid and not slyness). This state of affairs, which is especially common in the Republic of Moldova, needs to be corrected as soon as possible, especially since the highest hierarchy of the Russian Orthodox Church has given clear instructions to priests not to refuse the faithful to receive communion without obvious canonical grounds (see Resolutions Bishops' Councils 2011 and 2013 ). Thus, we should look for wise confessors, and if we have found such, we must obey them and, under their guidance, take communion as often as possible. Don't trust your soul to just anyone.

There have been cases when some Christians took communion on Easter, and the priest laughed at them in front of the entire church assembly, saying: “Wasn’t seven weeks enough for you to take communion? Why are you breaking the customs of the village?”. I would like to ask such a priest: “Didn’t four or five years of study in a spiritual institution be enough for you to decide: either you will become a serious priest, or you will go to pasture cows, because “stewards of the mysteries of God” (1 Corinthians 4: 1) they can't say such stupid things..." And we must speak about this not for the sake of ridicule, but with pain about the Church of Christ, in which even such incompetent people serve. A real priest not only does not forbid people to take communion, but also calls them to this and teaches them to live in such a way that they can approach the Chalice at every liturgy. And then the priest himself rejoices at how different he becomes Christian life his flock. "He who has ears to hear, let him hear!".

Therefore, “with the fear of God, with faith and love, let us draw near” to Christ, in order to better understand what “Christ is risen!” means! and "Truly risen!". For He Himself says:Truly, truly, I say to you, unless you eat the Flesh of the Son of Man and drink His Blood, you will not have life in you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day"(John 6:53-54).

Translation by Elena-Alina Patrakova

I have been asked the following question several times:

"Can we take communion at Easter? And on Bright Week? Do we need to continue fasting to receive communion?"

1. In the first centuries of the history of the Church, as we see in the canons and patristic writings, participation in the Liturgy without communion of the Holy Mysteries was simply unthinkable. (I advise you to read the article about this: “When and how should we take communion.”) However, over time, especially in our area, the level of piety and understanding among Christians began to fall, and the rules for preparing for communion became stricter, in places even excessively (including double standards for clergy and laity). Despite this, communion at Easter was a common practice, continuing to this day in all Orthodox countries. However, some postpone communion until Easter itself, as if someone is preventing them from approaching the Chalice every Sunday of Great Lent and throughout the year. Thus, ideally, we should take communion at every liturgy, especially on Maundy Thursday, when the Eucharist was instituted, on Pascha and on Pentecost, when the Church was born.

2. For those on whom penance is imposed because of some serious sin, some confessors are allowed to take communion (only) on Easter, after which, for some time, they continue to bear their penance. This practice, which, however, is not and should not be generally accepted, took place in ancient times, to help the penitent, to strengthen them spiritually, allowing them to join the joy of the holiday. On the other hand, allowing penitents to take communion on Pascha indicates that the mere passage of time and even the personal efforts of the penitent are not enough to save a person from sin and death. Indeed, for this it is necessary that the risen Christ Himself send light and strength to the soul of the penitent (just as the Monk Mary of Egypt, who led a dissolute life until the very last day of her stay in the world, was able to embark on the path of repentance in the desert only after communion with Christ) . From this arose and spread in some places the erroneous idea that only thieves and fornicators receive communion on Pascha. But does the Church have a separate communion for thieves and fornicators, and another for those who lead a Christian life? Is not Christ the same at every liturgy throughout the year? Doesn't everyone partake of Him - priests, kings, beggars, robbers, and children? By the way, the word of St. John Chrysostom (at the end of Paschal Matins) calls everyone without division to communion with Christ. His call “Those who fasted and those who did not fast, rejoice today! The meal is plentiful: everyone is satisfied! Taurus is big and well-fed: no one will leave hungry!” clearly refers to the communion of the Holy Mysteries. It is surprising that some read or listen to this word without understanding that we are not called to a meal with meat dishes, but to communion with Christ.

3. The dogmatic aspect of this problem is also extremely important. People are lining up to buy and eat lamb for Passover - for some, this is the only "biblical commandment" they keep in their lives (because the rest of the commandments do not suit them!). However, when the book of Exodus speaks of the slaughter of the Passover lamb, it refers to the Jewish Passover, where the lamb was a type of Christ the Lamb slain for us. Therefore, eating the paschal lamb without communion with Christ signifies a return to the Old Testament and a refusal to recognize Christ as "the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world" (John 1:29). In addition, people bake all kinds of Easter cakes or other dishes, which we call "Easter". But don't we know that "our Passover is Christ" (1 Cor 5:7)? Therefore, all these Paschal dishes should be a continuation, but not a replacement for the communion of the Holy Mysteries. This is not particularly mentioned in churches, but we should all know that Easter is, first of all, the Liturgy and communion of the Risen Christ.

5. And now about communion at Bright Week. The 66th canon of the Trullo Council (691) prescribes that Christians "enjoy the Holy Mysteries" during the entire Bright Week, despite the fact that it is continuous. Thus, communion is started without fasting. Otherwise, there would be no liturgy, or fasting would continue. The idea of the need to fast before communion concerns, first of all, the Eucharistic fast before receiving the Holy Mysteries. Such a strict Eucharistic fast is prescribed for at least six or even nine hours (not like Catholics, who take communion an hour after the meal). If we are talking about a multi-day fast, then the seven-week fast that we kept is quite enough, and there is no need - moreover, it is even forbidden - to continue fasting. At the end of Bright Week, we will fast on Wednesdays and Fridays, as well as during three other multi-day fasts. After all, priests do not fast during Bright Week before communion, and then it is not clear where the idea that the laity should fast these days comes from! Nevertheless, in my opinion, only those who have observed the entire Great Lent, who lead a whole, balanced Christian life, always strive for Christ (and not just by fasting) and perceive communion not as a reward for their works, but as a cure for spiritual diseases.

Thus, every Christian is called to prepare for the sacrament and ask for it from the priest, especially at Easter. If the priest refuses without any reason (in the event that a person does not have such sins for which penance is due), but uses all sorts of excuses, then, in my opinion, the believer can go to another temple, to another priest ( only if the reason for leaving for another parish is valid and not slyness). This state of affairs, which is especially widespread in the Republic of Moldova, needs to be corrected as soon as possible, especially since the highest hierarchy of the Russian Orthodox Church has given clear instructions to priests not to refuse the faithful to receive communion without obvious canonical grounds (see Resolutions of the Bishops' Councils of 2011 and 2013) . Thus, we should look for wise confessors, and if we have found such, we must obey them and, under their guidance, take communion as often as possible. Don't trust your soul to just anyone.

There have been cases when some Christians took communion on Easter, and the priest laughed at them in front of the entire church assembly, saying: “Wasn’t seven weeks enough for you to take communion? Why are you breaking the customs of the village?”. I would like to ask such a priest: “Didn’t four or five years of study in a spiritual institution be enough for you to decide: either you will become a serious priest, or you will go to pasture cows, because “stewards of the mysteries of God” (1 Corinthians 4: 1) they can't say such stupid things..." And we must speak about this not for the sake of ridicule, but with pain about the Church of Christ, in which even such incompetent people serve. A real priest not only does not forbid people to take communion, but also calls them to this and teaches them to live in such a way that they can approach the Chalice at every liturgy. And then the priest himself rejoices at how different the Christian life of his flock is becoming. "He who has ears to hear, let him hear!"

Therefore, “with the fear of God, with faith and love, let us draw near” to Christ, in order to better understand what “Christ is risen!” means! and "Truly risen!". After all, He Himself says: “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless you eat the Flesh of the Son of Man and drink His Blood, you will not have life in you. Whoever eats My Flesh and drinks My Blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day "(John 6:53-54).

Hello. I really want to confess, but I don't know where to start. More precisely, I'm afraid. I don't go to church regularly, but quite often. Every time I want to go up to the priest, ask, but fear shackles me. And again I leave it for later. It's hard on the soul. Please advise how to proceed. Sincerely, Elena.

Priest Philip Parfenov answers:

Hello, Elena!

Well, in your situation, you need to somehow overcome this fear, step over it and still start confessing - there is no other way. Walk around different temples, look at the priests, and in your city you will surely find someone before whom your soul will open. Ask around through friends, look at different sites of churches in St. Petersburg ... The seeker will always find! God help you!

Father, yesterday at a sermon in our church, the priest said that earlier, for the sin of fornication and witchcraft, they were excommunicated from communion for many years. Does this practice continue today?
Olga

Hello Olga!

Of course, nobody canceled the canons, and, theoretically, they can be applied in church practice. But, as far as I know, priests now prescribe much softer penances than the canons require. This is a forced measure associated with many factors, which are difficult to list. But, nevertheless, the canons give us the opportunity to understand how seriously the Church takes such sins as fornication and witchcraft.

Please tell me how to confess. Is it enough just to name a sin, like cheating loved one. Or is it necessary to tell in more detail what the deception was? Marina.

Priest Dionisy Svechnikov answers:

Hello Marina!

In most cases, simply naming the sin is sufficient. However, cheating is different. So it's better to be a little more specific. If necessary, the priest himself will ask to tell about something in more detail.

Hello, father. Please tell me how to confess to a 7-year-old child? Before, we just went to take communion, but from the age of 7, I heard that you need to go to confession. Thanks! Tatyana.

Hello Tatiana!

Try to explain to the child what sin is, that our sins upset God and therefore we must repent of them - that is, ask for forgiveness. Leave the rest to the priest, who should be warned that the child's first confession. In no case do not prepare a confession for the child, it is very important that he learns to feel sin on his own. But if a child asks you whether this or that act of his is a sin, then, of course, you can answer his question.

Hello! Tell me, please, what should I do if I have already confessed the same sin several times, but there is no relief, and the memory of sin still torments me? Thanks! Larisa.

Hello Larisa!

Consult with the priest at confession about what prayers or other spiritual means can help you. Personally knowing you and your sin, the priest at confession will give accurate and effective advice.

How to confess mental sins, in detail or in general phrases - blasphemous, obscene thoughts, or in detail, what specifically I thought? After all, there are some thoughts that cannot even be voiced.
And if we will answer for every word, and so many terrible words have been said in a lifetime, it is impossible to say all the words in confession, then should we speak in confession in general phrases? Tatyana.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello Tatiana!

Of course, so many terrible words have been said in a lifetime that it is impossible to say them in confession, and it is not useful either. But even "general" phrases can be more or less detailed. If thoughts constantly overwhelm you, then The best way their healing is to directly name them in confession. Then the priest will be able to tell you the most effective way fight them. The same applies to words - you can repent without remembering every word spoken, but describing the situation quite specifically.

Please tell me, is it possible to address God during confession with "You" or is it necessary to speak about the Lord in the third person when addressing a priest? Save me, God! Anna.

Priest Dionisy Svechnikov answers:

Hello Anna!

We repent before God, and the priest is the mediator between God and man. We confess to God, but we speak with a priest who accepts confession.

There is a lot of controversy about taking communion or not on Easter Day. IN Maundy Thursday tonight will be the last confession before Happy Easter. The question is that if you fail to get to confession on Maundy Thursday, will there be another confession at the night service on Great Saturday? Save me, God! Alexander.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello, Alexander! God bless you!

In each parish, this issue is resolved individually, depending on specific circumstances. But, of course, it is not possible to confess in detail on Easter, so try to confess in advance. In any case, for a final answer, you need to contact the church where you are going to come for Easter.

Are confessions recorded on various media in church practice? Does a confessing person have the right, without notifying the priest, to secretly keep a record of his confession? In general, is it possible to evaluate such actions? Thanks. Marina.

Priest Mikhail Samokhin answers:

Hello Marina!

Confession is a secret, the keeping of which is obligatory not only for the priest, but also for the confessor. A secret recording of a confession can be regarded as human dishonesty. If this is not prompted by some exceptional reasons about which you do not write anything. If you wish to record a confession, the priest must be made aware of this and give his blessing to it.

For more than a year I have been tormented by a mortal sin that I committed against my family. I constantly think that the Lord will not forgive me, or if he does, then I or my children will have to suffer terrible punishment. I have already confessed it, but still my soul is tormented. What should I do? How to live in peace? I have no strength, I cry all the time. . .
Thanks in advance for your help. Ekaterina.

Priest Dionisy Svechnikov answers:

Hello Ekaterina!

This happens, people continue to suffer after confession. This usually happens when the confession is not entirely sincere or complete. I think that you should go to the temple and personally talk to the priest, talk about the problem and ask for advice. In absentia, via the Internet, it is very difficult to help you.

You know, my mother makes me go to the Unction, but I don't want to. After all, after that you need to confess. But in order to confess, you need to feel the need of the soul, as I think. And I'm on this moment I don't feel it. And I think that without this confession makes no sense. Can you please tell me what to do? Love, 17 years old.

Priest Anthony Skrynnikov answers:

Hello Love!

Confession, as a rule, takes place before the unction, and not after. Forcing you to go to unction against your will is, of course, wrong. But on the other hand, you must understand that no mother wishes her child anything bad. No first grader wants to go to school. It is much more fun to play with soldiers and cars all day long. When we grow up, we begin to understand what a good deed our parents did in giving us an education.
If you do not feel a spiritual need for repentance, then this is a serious reason to think that something is happening to your soul. If we do not see our sins and the need to get rid of them, then our soul is dead. If we consider our conscience clear, then this is a sign of a short memory.
To awaken your conscience, you need to read the Gospel, spiritual literature, including about confession.

Does everyone need a confessor (or, more correctly, a spiritual father) and why? Olga.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello Olga!

A spiritual father is necessary for a Christian. There are many reasons for this. For a beginner who is just beginning to live a spiritual life, a confessor serves as a guide who will not let you get lost, can warn against many dangers and difficulties. The confessor is also a mentor, helping in spiritual growth and development. Also, the confessor is compared with a doctor who heals spiritual ailments. Many holy fathers write about the need to have a confessor.

How often should you go to confession? And if there are some moments of my life I can’t express to Batiushka in any way, but they gnaw at me, how can I overcome myself? Julia.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello Julia!

The frequency of confession depends on the intensity of spiritual life; this question is decided individually for each person. As a rule, confession and communion are advised at least once every 3-4 weeks, but this is only the most approximate guideline. How often you should confess, decide in a personal conversation with the priest to whom you confess. It does take some spiritual courage to confess some sins. Pray, ask the Lord for help. Perhaps a written confession will help you - write what you want to confess, and let the priest read the note, this is permissible. There is no "magic" way to overcome yourself - only self-compulsion, prayerful and spiritual effort can help you. May God give you strength!

I was baptized 2 years ago, I was not at confession. Now, I feel that it is simply necessary. Are sins described from the time of baptism? Or for your entire life? Several confessions. Please tell me! With best regards, Vladimir.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello Vladimir!

At Baptism, all sins committed earlier are forgiven, so there is no need to repent of them. It is necessary to confess the sins committed after Baptism, but if your conscience is restless, tell the priest about it.

Hello! Please resolve the issue. Is it possible to confess without preparation (1-3 days of fasting and reading the canons), if you are sure that you will not receive communion after this confession. Or not? Natalia.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello, Natalia!

Yes, you can confess without prior fasting and reading special prayers. Let me remind you, however, that Great Lent is now underway, which must be observed to the best of our ability.

I want to confess for the first time, but I am very worried about the following question: my husband and I are not married. We want to get married this summer. I remember that this is no reason to postpone confession until the summer. How can I be in such a situation? Ekaterina.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello Ekaterina!

Do not be embarrassed, the Church does not consider a registered marriage a sin, even if this marriage is not married. Therefore, there is no reason to postpone confession and communion until the summer. Now is coming Great Lent- a time of deep repentance. I wish you not to postpone confession, but take advantage of this grace-filled period of the church year.

Hello. IN Lately comes the realization of how much I have sinned in my life, recently I also had an abortion. I can't live like this anymore, I have no excuse. I repent very much of everything, I have a stone in my soul. Please tell me what I need to do, will the Lord forgive me if I repent of everything I have done? I don’t want to go to hell after death, because in fact I am not a bad person. Thanks. Ekaterina.

Hello Ekaterina!

I am sincerely glad that you have realized the gravity of your sins and repent of them. The Lord forgives us the sins of which we sincerely repent. You need to start with a confession in the temple, listen to the advice of the priest who will receive your confession. If he deems it necessary to give you penance, make every effort to fulfill it, and henceforth try not to allow in your life grave sins. Remember that the Lord loves every person and desires salvation for all of us. But we are saved not by our “merits”, but by the grace of God. And we are all sinners, but this is not at all the same as “bad”. Every person has the image of God, and we need to understand that all our “good” sides are from God. But we are sinners, we all distort the image of God with our sins, and therefore we must repent of our sins and we all need God's mercy. The word "repentance" in Greek sounds like "metanoia" and means "change of consciousness". It is necessary to repent in such a way as to be able to change, so that even the thought of repeating sin would be unacceptable for us. Pray, repent and do not despair of the Mercy of God! Help you Lord!

How to repent? Do I understand correctly that it is necessary to tell everything that was perfect and now torments? Can any church do this? Kseniya.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello Xenia!

You need to repent of those sins that you have noticed for yourself. This can be done in any church, but it is advisable to eventually find a confessor - a priest to whom you will regularly confess, and who will become your leader in spiritual life.

I can't get my spiritual life right. With home prayer, it somehow began to clear up after 4.5 years of going to church. But the trouble is with regular communion. I think: why should I prepare, try, if, in principle, no one needs me in the church. Everything rests on the indifference of the priests. They only do their work, they are not interested in the spiritual life of the flock, the individual. Confession either early, early in the morning, or during the service. All the actions of the clergy are aimed at raising money. One formalism, nothing alive. I read a lot of articles about confession, communion. There is good advice, but the articles come from the fact that you come to a conscientious and intelligent priest. Most of us in Kazan are hacks. To open the soul before them - the sediment remains, a feeling of annoyance. Such a psychological conflict. What do you recommend besides patience?
Thanks. Tatyana.

Hello Tatiana!

Coming to the Church, we do not come to this or that priest, good or bad, we come to God, to Christ. It is to Him that we turn in prayer, we unite with Him in the Sacrament of Communion, He forgives us of sins, heals our soul, directs our life. And He needs each of us, and is valuable, and dear. Remember that for your sake the Lord came to earth and accepted death on the cross. He loves you and wants you to be saved. Therefore, the first thing I can advise you is not to seek attention from the priest or parishioners in the church, but to meet with the Lord. And a Christian participates in the sacraments not in order to become necessary to someone - you need the sacraments, in them you receive God's grace, support of your spiritual forces, healing of spiritual illnesses.
Further, you write that you go to confession and commune irregularly, but at the same time you want the priest to pay special attention to you. But after all, one cannot lead the spiritual life of a person whom one does not know and sees irregularly. In such cases it is very difficult to give any advice. And sometimes the priest tries to give advice, but the interlocutor is not ready to hear it, and therefore takes offense at the priest. In addition, we must remember that confession is repentance for sins, and, as a rule, there is no need to describe those reasons at confession that, in our eyes, are “extenuating circumstances”. The Lord knows all extenuating circumstances better than we do, but sin remains sin, and we need to repent of it at confession. When you need to clarify something, the priest himself will ask the question. But often in confession one has to hear complaints about the bad temper of relatives and friends, unbearable conditions at work, and the like. And the purpose of confession is not to have a “spiritual” conversation with the priest, but to bring repentance to the Lord for sins and receive forgiveness from Him.
Well, the last thing I would like to tell you. Try not to wait for someone to need you, but to become needed by your neighbors yourself. Offer your strength for some parish activities, allocate time to visit the sick, the elderly, orphans, in a word, show someone attention and mercy yourself. Just do not expect something "in return", but just try to become useful to someone nearby. The feeling of uselessness and abandonment will pass very quickly, I assure you.
If you have any questions that you cannot find an answer to, write to us, I will try to answer your questions.

Hello! For some time now, after confession, I have been tormented by one question. If a woman had an abortion and repents of it (confession and candles for the repose of the soul of an unborn child), then God forgives this sin, but how does this affect a man who also took part in conception (a man does not confess and does not believe)? Thanks in advance for your reply. Natalia.

Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko answers:

Hello, Natalia!

The repentance of a woman does not affect a man in any way: everyone is responsible before God for their sins. So a man needs to repent, or he will answer for his sin before God.